hickumu: (Moko-chan)
Dancing between raindrops, never getting wet ([personal profile] hickumu) wrote in [personal profile] goldenkirbichu 2012-02-28 03:39 pm (UTC)

1/2 - less fun stuff

Now, to be fair, having someone friended on DW/LJ is a different kettle of fish than having them friended on plurk or AIM, since the means of communication and the usual subject matter are so different. Part of the reason I never friended you on the memes over the last while is that we seemed to have such different interests, I wasn't sure if we'd talk much anyway. It's only when I'm about to leave a game that I go on a mass friending spree - did the exact same thing the first time. I'm glad I did with you, if only because it is much easier for me to talk with you on DW. As you've probably noticed, I tend to TL;DR a lot myself. This way, we can't talk over one another.

And the sad thing is that several bad apples have ruined the bunch for you. A lot of people say that they have trouble reading social cues and whatnot - that's where the whole "ass burgers" joke came from - and want to learn to improve, but immediately go on the flaming defensive if their faux pauxs are pointed out. I don't doubt that you do have some genuine issues in that regard, largely because you remind me so much of an old real life friend of mine so much that I used to wonder if you were him, but that is the prevailing mentality nowadays.

You've just answered your own question - a clique is exclusionary, a group is not. I much prefer groups - that's what I always tried to pull together, between you and Naomi and Mon and Vyc and Aly and all the like. What I can say is that there's no need to implicate "the rest" of us. Vyc and Naomi don't have plurks, Levy hates this kind of thing just as much as you, and (while I don't know Sora as well) I seriously cannot see her participating in such a mentality. I haven't been on plurk in...months now. My difficulties are mostly in communicating with you - we have very different styles, in that regard - not with you as a person. And, like I said, the comment format of DW helps with that.

I also would not take anyone's reticence to "say anything" as a further bad sign against you. A lot of communication goes on in RP that we don't see - PMs and private plurks and the like. They're probably all assuming and hoping that you and her have talked things out like sane human beings. The alternative might lead to them having to pick sides - and, as fond as they probably are of both of you, picking sides is a brutal, bloody affair. This person is very social, not to mention a mod - it's hard to see if only because no one wants to see that kind of behavior in a person. Silence, in this case, might mean denial.

Some "pettiness" is to be expected when you've let your feelings stew as long as you seem to have. Honestly, there is scarcely a "right" or a "wrong" way to feel, especially if you're aware of it. I saw the thread as well. Neither of us should be reading rpanons, but there you go.

Unless you have noticed this kind of exclusionary behavior with other muns - and if you have with her, it would have to be pretty blatant - I wouldn't worry about your positions with them. Like I said, I think those that have noticed are hoping it's nothing, and hoping that it will get resolved by you two talking without them having to step in.

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